Our August matchups were nothing short of a beautiful disaster – powerhouses falling, dark horses charging into contention, and fantasy baseball playing musical chairs with the playoffs. Shelve the spreadsheets for a moment and indulge in the chaos – it’s recap time.

Wild Card Play-In (Week 20)

#4 Coastal Splitters def. #5 Nashville Stars, 421-308 (Shot Call League)

Nashville’s pitchers may have outscored the Coastal pitching staff, but their bats were on vacation as they mustered just 178 FPts compared to 328 for the Splitters. Vinnie Pasquantino, the Pa-Squatch, was spotted with 69.5 FPts and that was all she wrote.

#5 Super Smash Stros def. #4 Say Hey Kids, 448-395 (Basket Catch League)

Quantity over quality seemed to be the Super Smash motto: they rolled out four more SP starts than the Say Hey Kids, including Nick Pivetta’s encore (two-start week), netting a tidy 20 K (40 FPts) edge. Jurickson Profar did go nuclear for the Kids (63.5 FPts), but an ailing Zack Wheeler as the playoffs started-up will probably leave a bitter taste for this GM.

Divisional Round

#4 Coastal Splitters def. #1 LeBronto Blue James, 521-484 (Shot Call League)

The Coastal Splitters made a statement by launching 14 homers – exactly double what LeBronto managed – take a bow Mr. Kyle Schwarber. Meanwhile, LeBronto proudly racked up more innings pitched, only to convert fewer wins and saves than their underdog opponent. Despite out-manning the Splitters on the mound by 43 fantasy points, the Blue James couldn’t overcome the barrage of long balls. On offense, Juan Soto (62 FPts) and Kyle Schwarber (53.5) outscored George Springer (51) and company by a whopping 80 FPts – and yes, the Splitters are forever grateful that Jose Ramirez only managed 9 FPts this week.

#3 Brooklyn Robins def. #2 Perth Platypi, 536-444 (Shot Call League)

Brooklyn reminded everyone why homers and RBIs still rule the fantasy world, smashing their own 14 dingers and driving in 39 runs compared to Perth’s measly five and 21. On the pitching side, the Robins went 6 W – 2 L while the Platypi stumbled to a 5-9 record, proving that quality starts and wins matter more than just innings logged. Prospect fever hit its peak as Mark Vientos turned into a cheat code with 52 FPts, and Ian Seymour piled on two wins, 16 strikeouts, and 46 FPts as he worked his way to the 30-big-league-inning mark. Perth may have bowed out early, but they still snagged the SCL Charlie Division title – marking the first time the Splitters franchise didn’t claim that crown.

#1 Jackal Attack def. #5 Super Smash Stros, 446-404 (Basket Catch League)

The Jackal Attack somehow survived with just 446 points – the lowest winning total of the round. Brice Turang chipped in a tidy 37 FPts (worth noting), belting two homers in 30 at-bats, while Shane Smith’s two-start buffet delivered 13 innings, one win, two quality starts, ten punch-outs, and 38 FPts. Although the Super Smash Stros’ hitters outpaced the Jackals – led by Trent Grisham’s 47.5, Francisco Lindor’s 39, Otto Lopez’s 36, and Ian Happ’s 34.5 – it still wasn’t enough to knock off the top seed.

And to finally placate the endless outrage in the group chat from Jackal Attack: yes, we do talk about you in recaps – once you claw out a playoff win with the lowest point total of the winners, the story kind of writes itself. But let’s be real: turning Bo Bichette into Brice Turang for position versatility, securing Nolan McLean by getting to him in free agency first, and eking out a victory when the odds are stacked in your favor is exactly why you’re the top seed. Consider this your spotlight moment – a nod to your 16-4 regular season record – your strategic brilliance has been duly noted.

#2 Pablo and the Secret Weapons def. #3 Wally Mash, 531-502 (Basket Catch League)

Pablo’s offense exploded for a staggering 107-point advantage over Wally’s bats, which could have turned this into one-sided showcase – think again. Wally’s arms fought back, and outscored Pablo’s pitching by 80 FPts, but the deficit was simply too large to overcome. In relief, Aroldis Chapman chipped in 35.5 FPts – because clutch relief pitchers do matter – while Aaron Judge (57.5 FPts) and Willy Adames (46) helped seal the deal for Pablo.

Semi-Final Preview

SHOT CALL LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP: #4 Coastal Splitters vs. #3 Brooklyn Robins

The Splitters are riding a power surge and the Brooklyn Robins have timed a minor-league pitching carousel to perfection. Expect a slugfest where each long ball is answered with a counter, and the margin of victory feels measured in inches, not fantasy points.

BASKET CATCH LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP: #1 Jackal Attack vs. #2 Pablo and the Secret Weapons

Jackal Attack’s approach has been surgical, clutch, and just enough. Standing in their way now: Pablo’s juggernaut offense. Does Jackal get one step closer to hanging their logo on the Championship Banner? Or will a Secret Weapons bombardment make the championship look like a fireworks show?

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Remember gentlemen: glory awaits the bold, so burn those five weekly waiver-wire moves early and often. For those still in the hunt, may the nail-biting weeks ahead not distract you from your work week too much; and for the teams eliminated, may your players struggle mightily (so it’s easier to watch from the sideline).